Deer in the Headlights

Designer Benjamin Cho really hit a home run at fashion week with this highly practical, hand-knit, deer "head scarf." You would have to imagine Björk was on the guest list. Thanks to my friend Shannon for the sending me this, she knows I like to follow the latest trends in deer head scarf fashion.

Is it just me, or does "head scarf" sound like something frat guys do as a hazing ritual?

I WANT SOME ACTION

Just taking time out to highlight one of our t-shirts:

I Want Some Action is a super-soft, ring-spun, 100% cotton shirt featuring some of the greatest faces of tough guy action movies – Connery, Toshiro, Eastwood, Zatoichi, Alain Delon, Gordon Liu, Kurt Russell, Charles Bronson, Shaft, Santo, James Coburn, Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Sammo Hung, Lee Marvin, Bruce Willis, Terence Hill, Jackie Chan, Chow Yun Fat and Sonny Chiba.

Check it out:

Ain't it Cool Bad Grammar?

Movie fans around the world have been subjected to reading some of the worst grammar imaginable for a few years now, due to the dominance of Ain't It Cool News as a source of upcoming film leaks, etc. It's a popular site that obviously makes money – so why don't they use spell check at least once every so often, or glance at a Chicago Manual of Style?

I've singled out some of the most convoluted and mistake-ridden sentences in "reviews" and updates written by Harry Knowles of aintitcoolnews.com, all found in ONE DAY (2/4/08) of postings on his main page. I realize they have to rush scoops out over there, but come on... Reading these sort of feels like someone typed out one of my headaches.

As a service to movie fans everywhere, I would like to offer my humble services as proofreader for the site – for a modest fee.

Check out these bizarre, mind-halting ramblings masquerading as sentences:

However, if you love Silver Age JUSTICE LEAGUE comics when the villains were typically things much larger and much more bizarre than the typical super-villain of the week.

What if there’s not shot of a toothy biting crotch monster – and instead it’s a film about empowering the victim – and giving her a strength and a power that is actually quite delicious – and allows the young innocent lamb to be a wolf in sheep’s clothing – striking at those that would fleece and cook the young lamb?

But HUD is “the best friend”.

What really struck me was the three names under the Screenplay by credit.

Jared found his great uncle’s Field Guide – and despite a note warning him not to read it… what kid wouldn’t open a book with a warning not to read it? But when he opens it – it sends out a beacon… as if to tell the world… “Some idiot has touched the book” – in a way – it’s like the ring in LORD OF THE RINGS – but instead of indeterminate powers of darkness… this book has the secrets of magic and creatures.

Since LORD OF THE RINGS and HARRY POTTER – there has been a ton of fantasy films coming out that want to become series.

But inbetween the awesome play of the New York Giants - making THE GREATEST TEAM IN THE HISTORY OF THE GAME look... meh... was this spot from WALL*E and Pixar. If you didn't know. This is going to be the film that you remember as being the film you saw in 2008, for the rest of your life. It will be mind-blowing and soul-affirming. And I can not count the seconds till it plays.

According to the highly reliable folks at Action-Figure.Com it seems that in the UK, at least, the first 3 episodes of Lucasfilm's animated CLONE WARS - will get theatrical distribution of the 90 minute film.

And the director of HONYE, I SHRUNK THE KIDS, THE ROCKETEER, THE PAGEMASTER, JUMANJI, OCTOBER SKY (a film I love so much), JURASSIC PARK III and HIDALGO.

It's a tough thing as a real director to come into a project at this late a date.

This trailer just unleashed asskickery during the Super Bowl and resulted with the audience here at Geek HQ cheering...

The reason is – I thought he had a real eye for what I love about real women, that are real fun to love on. And his adult stories are the equivalent level of eroticism as all our girls read in those tawdry sweaty romance novels. Only shot for us guys to share with our ladies.

It's kinda like the best Lovecraft film ever, and it to has been colored.

Another solid Pinky Violence film – starring the originl Delinquent Girl Boss, Reiko Oshida, as the bad girl trying to go straight… but wouldn’t ya know it, just when she thought she got out, they pull her back in.

The writers on X-MEN through X3 never did nail what was great about that character, so Marsden never had the role that ultimately he had. This was mainly due to the strengthening of the Wolverine character. Then in his role in SUPERMAN RETURNS – he was very strong, but as a character that nobody wanted to have screen time, but he was really good.

An excellent film that’s only real fault is that it is not the first.

That said – for a Neil Jordan film – it feels like a lessor film.

As always – the dvd art and titles are clickable to Amazon where you can learn more about the titles, purchase them – and this column will be thankful by continuing to searching out the interesting works being released each and every week.


...Aren't nerds supposed to be smart?

CNN Headlines Gone Wild!

I am amazed at the monumental dumbing down of content on news sites over the last two years, and CNN really has taken the ball and run with it. At this point CNN.com seem completely commited to getting unique Web hits (and ad revenue) by replicating the appeal of Youtube-style videos, rather than providing any sort of actual relevant news service.

Here are actual headlines for recent stories that CNN feels confident enough to call "Latest News."

Try reading them aloud in your best Walter Cronkite/serious newscaster voice:

Sasquatch: Fact or fiction?
Wealthy dogs love spaghetti dinners
XL underwear smothers fire
Lucy Liu wants her work to matter
Survey: No astronaut ever seen drunk on launch day
Grunty baby polar bear learns to crawl
Dr. Phil bums out Star Wars fanatic's wife
Governor's son sells 'Don't Drop the Soap'
Nuns-and-nude ad upsets Catholics
Spacecraft falling! Get set to duck?
Big shark chomps bitty shark at aquarium
Hello Kitty statue unveiled
Priest says church needs more exorcists
Is your child a 'Weepublican' or a 'Demoquat?'
Exploding whale is viral vid 38 years later
'Honey, Mommy has cancer'

Isn't there a war on?

Chris W Bosh - Send Me To New Orleans All Star Game 2008

Speaks for itself:



I Love This Game!

Best Dressed Felon 2008 Contender

William Torres of Allentown, PA sports a stunning look as he is escorted from the police station to the jail.

As if his ensemble wasn't crime enough, he is accused of gunning down two men in cold blood. I'm assuming it was because they made fun of his cute slippers.

There's no fashion statement quite like a skull-covered white hoodie, overly groomed thin beard and satiny pj pants to let the world know: "I am a jackass."

I'm sure the other inmates are going to appreciate this bold look, and he's certainly raised the bar for other Best Dressed Felon contenders for the rest of the season.

Read his story...

EXTRA! Non-News that is Not Happening Bulletin!

I happened across this informative headline on Google's news page this afternoon:

Jennifer Lopez Not In Hospital & Not Giving Birth Today

...and was wondering why something that ISN'T happening made it into the news of the day. What other major news stories that aren't actually happening are we being denied? How many mindless word clusters of meaningless, time-wasting media blather must be generated per day to meet the quota of vapid, useless Internet content needed to generate Google ad revenue? How much was this reporter paid to turn in a story about something not happening?

Other possible stories that could be reported, using this same logic:

Mole people not digging sinkhole under Pentagon building

Tennis legend Jimmy Connors not living on surface of Jupiter

Scientist not splicing genes of owls and sharks together to create terrifying army of flying, keen-eyed, certain-death machines

George Clooney and Brad Pitt not married under Massachusetts law

James Brown not risen from the dead, not feasting on his family's brains

Tom Hanks not cloned from Joseph Goebbels' DNA

Body parts not found along I-90 are not those of Bob Newhart

Barack Obama not switching to Sanka

Pepperidge Farm not introducing actual goldfish-flavored Goldfish® crackers

Oprah Winfrey not ballooning up to 400 lbs.

Bond 22 not to be titled "Dudefinger"

Tennis legend Jimmy Connors also not living in fabled "Castle Duckula"